Thursday, March 31, 2005
R.I.P. Mitch Hedberg
Great comedian. Died of a "heart attack"(probably overdosed) yesterday.
Some of his greatest hits:
More here.
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Some of his greatest hits:
I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.
An escalator can never break. It can only become stairs. You would never see an "Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order" sign, just "Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience."
I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shishkabobs
My sister wanted to be an actress, but she never made it. She does live in a trailer. She got half way. She's an actress, she just never gets called to the set.
I never joined the army because at ease was never that easy to me. Seemed rather uptight still. I don't relax by parting my legs slightly and putting my hands behind my back. That does not equal ease. At ease was not being in the military. I am at ease, bro, because I am not in the military.
I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that.
You know that Pepperidge Farm bread, that stuff is fancy. That stuff is wrapped twice. You open it, and then still ain't open. That's why I don't buy it, I don't need another step between me and toast.
I would imagine if you could understand Morse Code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy.
I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.
Someone handed me a picture and said, "This is a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture of you is when you were younger. "...Here's a picture of me when I'm older." Where'd you get that camera man?
More here.
